Experts Say Plywood is the Secret to a Long Life
According to top experts in life science, plywood is the secret to a long life. “It’s basically a miracle drug on steroids.” Say Bill Simons, a PHD Harvard graduate. Plywood is usable as an alternative to almost every part of your daily health routine. It is recommended to rub it on your skin every 3 to 4 hours, and within 2 weeks, it can remove wrinkles, pimples, and rash! Not only that, but mixing 8-10 ounces of diced plywood into warm water gives all the natural vitamins your body needs. We have had five reporters try out this routine, and their results have been so significant that within three weeks they were found unresponsive! “I can’t believe it took this long to discover” says Noble Prize winner Albert Einstein. The CDC is currently doing medical examination on our behalf, but according to them, “The results are promising” and “we may be onto a real goldmine of innovation.” We also have had multiple professors from colleges including Harvard and Yale start conducting their own research. “This is the most ingenious thing I have ever tried.” Says a top professor at Harvard.