Airlines Shutting Down Due to Lack of Terrorists
Since February 2025, the average amount of people per flight has decreased by nearly 68%. I was baffled by this change, so decided to look deeper, and it is sick.
Ever since 1987 when terrorists first hit over 50% of people traveling by plane, they have been the dominant percentile. However, in recent times the government has been hiring more terrorists than ever. This means that they have less free time than normal. “They used to just collect unemployment pay to help fund their take overs of airplanes, or kidnapping of famous people. But ever since the government has been hiring them for jobs such as ICE or the police department, they have been more focused on getting paid to shoot unarmed minorities.” Says Barbra Kenneth, one of TN’s top researchers.
This radical shift in the lives of terrorists has caused the average percentage of terrorists flying to fall to just 47%, the first time being below 50% since 1987. If this trend continues airlines could face bankruptcy. “We already have plans to cut our daily flights to Epstein Island down to bi-weekly. It’s just these terrorists don’t have the free time for vacation like they used to. They went from spending 2-3 weeks away from home, down to an average of less than a week.” Says Caroline Clayton, spokesperson for American Airlines.
This is especially hitting airlines that terrorists didn’t fly much such as Frontier and Spirt. The decrease has hit Frontier Airlines so hard that they are in the process of filing for chapter 11 bankruptcy.
Luckily there is an upside, apparently the US government has not been properly paying their new hired terrorists, leading to a lot of them starting to quit their current jobs. This could be what is needed to reignite the American Flight Industry.